You'll always be my Konstantine

I want change, I crave it. I get bored so easily. That's why I'm always braced for the run, to try an escape that ever encroaching darkness that promises to hollow me out again. I hate when things remind me of the people who've left me behind. I hate when I still look at them and miss them. But the worst is when I miss people who still willingly call themselves mine.

Sometimes I wake in the middle of the night from the pain of missing a place I've never been. This is where the loneliness strikes.

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Thu Jan 26

The Pockets

alliemorse:

“I’m jealous of children. I envy them.”
You said.

I asked you why.

“Because their pockets are empty. They don’t need to carry anything. No cell phones, wallets, car keys, cigarettes, lighters, iPods… you know what I mean? They’re free. As we get older, we give ourselves more and more things to worry about. To lose. Reasons to pat our pockets in a panic in case we’re missing something. A list to run through in our head before we walk out the front door. That’s why I envy children.”

I nodded and finished my drink, wondering if I had my wallet with me.